Maggie Armitage

A Very Little Christmas

My family was never big on occasions. My parents forgot my 21st birthday (back when it was the ‘key of the door’, the key of the door now being 14), we all regularly forgot or failed to mark each other’s big birthdays. My brother always actively avoided his and my mother decided that it was […]

Maggie’s Twilight Zone Messages

As a former model, my only simultaneously fictional and non-fictional friend Maggie Armitage has always known how to pose for a photo. I have no bad shots of her. Hair-raising, terrifying, yes; bad, no. This was taken just before chemo turned my hair white and made most of it fall out. Maggie is wearing a […]

Further Up The Stream Of Unconsciousness

A far cry from the world of Wodehouse, perhaps, but written in the same spirit, are Maggie Armitage’s weekly text messages to me. Here are a few from this week. Be thankful you’re getting the short versions. I like to think of her writing in the same vein as EM Delafield’s ‘Diary of a Provincial […]

Stream Of Unconsciousness

Saudi Arabia is going online with an unlicensed nuclear reactor created from private business documents in the US. Labour and Tory are uniting to destroy both their parties. Things getting a bit too crazy for you out there? You don’t know crazy. We haven’t had an update from Maggie Armitage lately, so here’s a batch of […]

Maggie’s Mind Lint 4

Time for another dip into the bran-tub of Maggie’s mind. This brings us up to date. For those of you who haven’t been following this, the eponymous white witch from my Bryant & May books is very much a real person and sends me immense texts that reveal the threshing machine of her thought processes. […]

Maggie’s Mind Lint 3

It’s been a while since we dipped back into the unhinged world of my dear friend Maggie Armitage and the stream of unconsciousness texts she sends me on a daily basis. Some of these are insightful. Some are simply as mad as an old man’s trousers. Maggie definitely invented the selfie years before anyone else […]

Maggie & Raymond Look At The Year Ahead

We have two guest columnists today: Raymond Kirkpatrick is a colleague of Arthur Bryant’s. The bear-like heavy metal-loving Professor of English is currently working at the British Library. Maggie Armitage is a Grand Order Grade IV White Witch of the Coven of St. James the Elder in London’s Kentish Town. In retrospect it was probably not a […]

The Real Characters Behind Bryant & May

This may be the first of an occasional series to show where characters come from. My mad and melancholy white witch Maggie Armitage may be found in the pages of most Bryant & May novels, usually either helping to solve a crime or making matters worse, but as many of you know she’s based on […]

Where Do You Get Your Characters?

A frequent question with an easy answer; from real life. A reader once accused me of making up the character of Maggie Armitage in the Bryant & May books – he didn’t believe anyone could be that barmy. But she is, (if anything, more so) and hardly any part of her character is made up […]