New Heights Of Vulgarity
Just when it seems that London’s bling-property economy may be faltering (as reported in the press this week), the ‘developers’ of the new FutureSlums (sorry, ‘Luxury Loft Lifestyle’ Apartment Buildings) at South London’s Nine Elms are planning to bring to our fair city, or at least 1% of 1% of London, this hilarious Six Senses-style leisure facility;
I love CAD, don’t you? It can make anywhere look like Monte Carlo. But this is Nine Elms, famous for the astounding pollution levels of its one-way systems, its dripping, creepy railway arches, its dodgy leather bars and shortly, its high-security zone surrounding the new American Embassy Fortress of Solitude. And we’ve never seen a cerulean sky like that over the area. Twitter pal Dave Skinner put the scene straight.
Oh, and here’s how it may or may not look from above, as shown to a handful of super-rich (who won’t ever use the pool anyway because hey, they’ll never see the building anywhere other than in their portfolios).
At least this time they got the pollution haze right, and that building behind it looks like the Baltic Exchange after the bomb went off. The sun loungers are a nice touch too, for anyone wishing to get a soot-tan. Bring a sweater.
Coming soon, the City Road Roller Coaster and the Kentish Town Zero Gravity Russian Lapdancing Bar.