4D Cinema

The Arts

Last night I watched ‘Avatar’ in the jungle, projected onto a bed sheet from a presumably pirated DVD (not as glamorous as this picture, trust me) which added a surreal level of enjoyment to ‘Avatar’. There was no 3D but instead you could be bitten to pieces by mosquitos (something Sam Worthington didn’t have to worry about) and the sound of the forest was almost drowned out by frogs.

Watching ‘Avator’ again, now stripped of the awe-filling 3D, I noted the following;

1. The animated bits look like plasticky renditions of ‘Yes’ album covers.

2. Sam’s Na’avi girlfriend is really annoying in a kind of ’80s Californian veggie-feminist way.

3. The peaceful natural world of Pandora still hinges on hunting things to death and taming animals rodeo-style.

4. The creepy body-fascism and cherry-picking ‘nice’ African traits feel uncomfortably condescending.

5. The cod-African soundtrack is shockingly rubbish.

6. The cartoonishly villainous ‘Sgt Rock’ captain is rarely seen without a coffee mug or a cigar.

7. Giovanni Ribisi is doomed to only play slimy, weak-willed creeps.

8. Pandora’s night forest looks like a South-East Asian gay disco.

9. Sigourney Weaver should have been allowed to get into a bulldozer and fight a monster.

10. The film is still pretty mesmerising entertainment.

5 comments on “4D Cinema”

  1. Alan G says:

    Sorry Chris – I got about halfway through Avatar before giving up in disgust.

  2. Steve W says:

    Sorry, Chris – I, partly, agree with Alan G. This is not the film it is cracked up to be. What with the breast-beating for the facistic way the colonials treated the native Americans resulting in a sweeter than saccharin storyline. Not to mention the ridiculous computer generated facial expressions. I find myself likening it to “Who Framed Roger Rabbit” with the live-action interacting with the cartoons.
    Like you, however, I find I can suspend reality for the duration of time it takes to watch the film and derive some enjoyment from the act.

  3. Yeah, crap and re-tread of hoary old plot lines, but it’s presented in a not-boring way. I wouldn’t watch it a second time, though…

  4. Gretta says:

    I’ve never even watched it. Never seen Titanic, either. Do I win a prize?

    PS: Just what does a South-East Asian Gay disco look like?

  5. Helen Martin says:

    I’m with you, Gretta, never seen either, although I had thought about Avatar, and I, too, wonder about the SE Asian Gay disco. The thought of watching that movie in a jungly setting is very appealing and I can really understand the thinking of the organizers.

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