Things I Learned In Estonia…


1. When to keep the kids home from school; once it officially goes below -24 degrees Centigrade. A government ruling, apparently. -23 degrees and they still have to go. While I was in Tallinn this weekend, it was mild, just -3C. Last June it snowed (admittedly for the first time in 500 years). After a […]

No Repression Of Expression


The appalling events in Paris are still unfolding after the Islamic extremists’ attack on the staff of Charlie Hebdo magazine, but one thing is clear; around the free world a deep sense of outrage is overcoming the usual liberal breast-beating. The attitude of ‘Why did we fail these people?’ is for once notable by its […]

Eight Trends That Shot Right Past Me


As we enter the PBTTF period of 2015 (Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?) I am already realising that certain things are happening without my knowledge. I know this will occur at a greater and greater speed, partly because I am not hanging out with The Youngs as much as I did and partly because I don’t actually […]

The Man With The X-Rayed Eyes: Update


I’ve now been seen by my surgeon and have been referred to a specialist about my eye condition. Here’s the gruesome bit: Because I was unusually young to qualify for the surgery I had, my aqueous humor is still ‘sticky’ and thickened over my eye; it will disperse in time, but there’s no time limit […]

Do Your Worst, 2015, I Dare You


I hope you all found suitably cheery ways to launch yourselves into the new year. We hit the chilly streets of Barcelona (where even the local vegetable store was mixing cocktails and people on street corners were selling bottles of champagne) not realising that it’s customary to wear evening dress for the occasion or at […]

On Being A Multiple


  This is Chris Fowler. He’s not me, by the way. But he bears my name and is probably a lot smarter than I’ll ever be. This charismatic guy is a respected American sportscaster working for ESPN who happens to share my name. I have a common name. Taxi drivers make one of two jokes about […]

The Wonderful World Of Nativi-Tat


The news this Christmas that a biblical mistranslation is responsible for the idea of Christ being born in an inn stable comes as no real surprise to me. Because I know Christ was born beside a jacuzzi, and I have proof. If you’re looking for really mind-boggling religious rubbish, head for the Catholic Mediterranean countries, […]

The Speech I Should Never Have Made


I’m seen here having won two awards. I can’t remember what they were for, because moments after this photo was taken the plaques attached to them fell off and I couldn’t glue them back on. I don’t respect awards very much; as a juror on many panels, I know they’re at best arbitrary and at […]

‘God Is In The Guts’


So said Yoshinori Ishii, the chef showing us the Ikejime method of killing a fish. He paralysed it with a sharp point to the brain, and severed its spine so that its body didn’t get traumatised – the difference is visible to the naked eye; the meat looks entirely different to that of most fish, […]

And A Tale Of Old Soho…


I briefly mentioned this in ‘Film Freak’ but was reminded of it yesterday, walking through Soho on a day when veils of grey mizzle were drifting across the empty streets, and I passed the building where it happened. It illustrates what we put up with then. It was raining hard on that day, too, when […]