In the last post I pointed out that this accolade belonged to Fortnum & Mason – it doesn’t, of course. That title belongs to M&M World Leicester Square, a gigantic, dead shop dedicated to selling little sugary sweets and plastic containers, and nothing else.
As it’s impossible to self-finance a huge site selling this kind of tourist tat (busby wearing M&M, anyone? How about a plastic bracelet for thirty quid?) one can only assumed it’s a vanity project designed to stop the head of the company from hearing the melancholy wind blowing through his soul.
In fact, this M&M World doesn’t even sell the US range of flavours – are there actual flavours? Colours, then – because the additives allowed in the US aren’t allowed here.
The staff desperately attempt to make their terrible, grim jobs less awful by trying to outsmile anyone who comes through the door, and no doubt they’re given ghastly pep-talks by some sad M&M manager about the M&M ‘philosophy’, but nothing can disguise the fact that this is a primary-coloured hole in the ground filled with junk built for divorced dads who have run out of places to drag their screaming hyperactive children.
It seems fitting that the W, London’s most offensively ugly new building, has been dumped on top of it.