The Fear Of Being Disconnected

Film

I had wi-fi in Sri Lanka and Cambodia, even in parts of Oman, but this one has defeated me. On Thursday I’m off here, to Bodrum, on the Turkish coast…

And I’ll be on board a gulet, which means no electronic communication. I didn’t realise how completely the internet had taken over my life until I caught myself panicking about this. After all, I have to file copy to UK newspapers and conduct all my business online. Ten days is a long time in London. I could find everything changed when I get back. Someone will have taken my identity. All my favourite shops will have gone. My front door lock could be changed.

There’s also ‘limited’ electricity, and virtually everything in my luggage needs charging; book, toothbrush, phone, headphones, iPod, iPad, laptop etc. I’m amazed we’ve reached this stage without having to charge up our shoes before we go out.

When did I turn from a happy, hippyish spontaneous guy to someone who has to sort out his adaptor plugs before going anywhere?

But, as the thriller writer CJ Box says, ‘We used to go online to collect information, now we go online to talk about ourselves’, so you might appreciate me shutting up for a few days. I think there should be a special word for this new phobia, don’t you?

9 comments on “The Fear Of Being Disconnected”

  1. Helen Martin says:

    What terrible things can happen to the coast of Turkey? It’s a lovely place and that boat looks like just the sort of moving accommodation to guarantee a perfect time away – unless it is Chris Fowler renting it. We await your holiday report with bated breath. (I started to type baited, but couldn’t think what to bait it with.)

  2. Some of us quite enjoy your ramblings. 🙂 Have a great holiday, Chris!

  3. Alan Morgan says:

    Pencils, jotting pad, water colour tin, brushes. Book. Normal toothbrush. You’re such a big girlie, Mr. F! :0)

    We expect nothing less than the Heart Of Darkness. Did you used to think that if you died in an evil place..?

    Have a good trip. The horror, the horror.

  4. mikenicholson says:

    “When did I turn from a happy, hippyish spontaneous guy to someone who has to sort out his adaptor plugs before going anywhere?”

    Chris, lad, you’ve clearly not been reading your own blog.

    It happened quite some time ago, I’d say.

    Take a modest-sized paper book that you either want to read again or have never read and want to.
    Just – the – one.
    Or. . . no books at all.
    It all sounds like bliss to me.
    The quiet, and isolation, the sheer lack of the 21st century.
    All will be well and all will be well.

  5. Gretta says:

    Oh, Admin, Admin, Admin…think of it as a techno-detox session. Sure you’ll be a shaking, screaming mess for the first couple of days, but then your body will adjust and you’ll return to being a happy hippy once again. Either that or you’ll tip completely over the edge and murder everyone on the boat. Whatever, have a wonderful holiday!

  6. Alan Morgan says:

    This is the bit in the story where we’re told why no one’s phone or internet works.

  7. Anne Fernie says:

    Crikey me. Take the plunge in every sense of the word – it will do you the power of good (oh and leave your wristwatch behind too……)

  8. cindie says:

    You’re maybe lucky to be out of touch while the News Corp. Scandal unfolds, although I am sure no one in London is that surprised at the lengths to which Murdoch will go. It will all be waiting for your return. Enjoy the disconnection.

  9. jan says:

    U r a dopey wazuck i’ve done that route on a gulet and its bliss really u don’t need any of this electrickery stuff – well maybe to keep the beers cold in the ice box but thats IT

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